


Dave Katz and The Internet

by fluffyboiis (flavouredkiisses)



Series: in a room full of art id still stare at you [ Dave lives and the apocalypse doesn't happen ] [1]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Ben Hargreeves is Alive, Card Games, Card shuffling, Dave doesn't like memes, Fluff and Humor, Kissing, Klaus introduces dave to the internet, M/M, Memes, Nonbinary Character, Other, Sibling Bonding, Sibling Love, Someone teach ben how to shuffle, UNO, because i dont see enough of them, ben makes fun of dave, but he likes cat videos, but i love nb klaus, but just for daves family members, dave gets sad, i like cis male klaus, mentions of original characters - Freeform, nonbinary klaus, they are mentioned for like 1 para
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-31
Updated: 2019-03-31
Packaged: 2019-12-29 01:01:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,295
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18297233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flavouredkiisses/pseuds/fluffyboiis
Summary: Dave Katz got curious and decided to find out what the internet was with Klaus ( and sometimes Ben.)Alt desc; ben sucks at shuffling and takes way too long and Klaus is a bastard and Dave is just a baby,, please he cant take anymore stress Klaus plea-





	Dave Katz and The Internet

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this because i had a shit day and wanted to make myself feel better so i decided to share this with you maybe you'll get a laugh out of it! who knows?
> 
> edit 4/3/19: i realized August 1st falls on a Wednesday like im such an idiot i dIDNT REALLY THINK DID I

_Wednesday; 2:20 PM // August 1st, 2019_

Dave never regretted coming back with Klaus.

It was by far the best decision he had ever made! Though at times he felt a little out of place and he felt awkward and weird being where he was. Which was probably because he wasn't from this time and he should have been older by now but he wasn't. (He is not complaining though!)

There were certain times where he felt uncomfortable in the Hargreeves household, which wasn't a lot by the way since the Hargreeves were pretty much his family by now. 

They were suspicious at first, (He nearly got himself stabbed more than once, mind you.) but they eventually got to know him and they grew closer. He really likes the hargreeves, they make him feel at home. 

They remind him of his sisters and brother. 

He sure did miss them. 

His little sisters Anna and Minnie. The sweetest things, he remembers sending letters to them as frequent as he could. He hoped they got them.

And his brother Charlie. He missed him too. He remembers he was always nice to him and was there for him. 

He didn't focus on them too much, it made him tear up and cry. When he cried, Klaus cried and he absolutely hates when Klaus cries. 

Right, Klaus. 

His  _Klaus._

His beautiful, free, loving Klaus. The reason he was here. And while he was here he was introduced to new things! 

Like cereal. Well, okay he already knew what cereal was but he learned something about it. you  _ **never**_   ** _ever_** pour the milk before the cereal, Dave Katz learned that the hard way. 

He had made the mistake of pouring the milk before the cereal, he was stared at as he had just committed a heinous crime! ( and apparently, he did to some extent?) He was quickly sat down and had a talk with Diego and Five on why it is awful and disgraceful to pour the milk before the cereal.

Or that one other time he ordered some pizza for all of them and he ate the crust first and started eating the pizza from there.

Klaus quickly corrected him before any more damage could be done.

Now today, today was sort of a different day. 

It was a sunny Saturday afternoon Klaus and Him were laying down in his room joined by Ben. Ben was busy shuffling Uno cards getting them ready for him, Klaus, and Dave to play Uno. 

Klaus was busy painting their nails a nice dark purple color, waiting for Ben to be done shuffling the cards. Ben didn't even know how to shuffle cards but he tried his best, and that's all anyone could do really. 

And Dave trying not to die of a heat stroke, as to be expected when it's 90 degrees outside. 

" Ben, can you hurry up with the cards! We wanna play Uno, Dearest brother!" Klaus whined. 

" I'm going as fast as I can Klaus," Ben replied, " Go on your computer or something while you wait just stop pestering me. I'll let you know when I'm done!"

Klaus groaned, getting up from their bed not even letting their nails dry and he retrieved their computer from their nightstand. 

Dave was confused.

It kinda looked like a computer.

Not any computer he has seen before, it opened and closed.  It was odd. 

" What in God's name is that?" Dave pointed at the lap-top Klaus held close to their chest.

" What? This? Oh, It's a laptop- do you not know what a laptop is?" Klaus questioned.

Dave gave them an ' i came from the 1900s does it look like I know what a fucking laptop is it?' look.

" Oh right. Not from here sorry." Klaus chuckled.

" Now, Klaus dear will you please tell me what that is." Dave propped himself on the bed next to Klaus. 

" Here- let me show you." Klaus placed the laptop on the bed in front of both them. He opened his laptop and there was a colorful background. It sort of hurt his eyes. 

And then it switched to something else, " Welcome, Dearest Dave to the wonderful internet!"

" Internet?" 

" That's Right!" Klaus laughed.

" Klaus don't traumatize Dave." Ben cut in, continuing to struggle in shuffling the cards.

" Shut it ben, focus on your damn cards."  

Dave was a little worried he wasn't gonna lie. That's when Klaus started to type something in, and there that sat in front of him were cats?

" Oh, you are gonna love these Davey!" Klaus jabbered, happily. Dave thought it was adorable, so he compiled of watching these tiny little gremlins. 

He continued to watch the screen, there was a little black kitten pawing at the screen giving it a cute and confused meow. Dave could relate.

Dave chuckled, " Man, aren't they just the cutest little things?" Dave adverted his gaze to Klaus, who had just smiled mischievously.

Suddenly fear was all Dave knew. 

He was the prey.

So, for the last 10 minutes, they watched cat videos. The cat videos were nice while they lasted. Then Klaus opened a new tab.

Dave was horrified.

" Okay, are you ready?" 

" Think so."

" My dearest dave. My honeybun, My baby, I present to you every facebook mom's favorites! Minion memes!" Klaus jazzed their hands in front of the computer.

" meems? facebook? " 

" I'll explain later! Just look."

Dave leaned over taking a good look at the pictures in front of him, there was a yellow creature and words on the side that read ' I hate it when I'm singing and the artist gets the words wrong." 

" Wh- That doesn't make any sense the artist wrote the song." 

" Yes dave that's the joke." Ben pinched the bridge of his nose he was just about done with his brothers and his boyfriend's bullshit. 

" I just have a small question what the fuck are those yellow things?" Dave squinted at Klaus.

" Oh, those are minions. It's from some movie I never watched." Klaus let out a huff.

" You know one of them is named Dave," Ben added.

Dave just wanted to move on.

" Okay I have another thing to show you and then we'll be done for the day.'' Klaus looked at dave with a smile.

" Alright. Show me what you've got." grumbled dave, he was very tired and exhausted and just wanted to play Uno. 

" Here." 

In front of him was his worst nightmare. 

The picture was a white cat with two legs and the caption read, ' when u walking' 

" That poor baby!" Dave croaked, sniffling.

" Wait, Babe, it's not real. "

" How can someone just make fun of that poor baby- I can't believe this!" Dave quickly stood up.

" Wait- babe lemme explain- just sit back down." 

" No! I will find whoever did this!"

By now Ben was on the floor wheezing.

" Babe it's not real!" Klaus stood up grabbing Dave's arms.

" Pardon?"

" Yeah, babe they are faked I promise!"

After a few minutes of searching, they found the original picture. The cat with all four legs and dave was relieved, to say the least.

" Also have one more thing to show you! " Klaus concluded.

Klaus pressed a short kiss onto Dave's lips. Dave's face reddened, " Love! You gotta let me know when you're gonna do that! "

" Finally! I'm finished! we can play Uno now." 

As soon as Ben let them know Allison, Luther, Five, Diego and Vanya peeped their heads in, " Uno?" 

"No! there is no Uno here!" Dave snatched the cards away from Ben and threw them onto the bed.

" You bitch! I worked hard on shuffling those!"

And thus ben would never forget the day dave ruined his shuffled cards.

And Dave would forever be traumatized.

And Klaus? Yeah no Klaus was actually okay.


End file.
